Suck it Heidi Klum

I’m crabby today for a multitude of reasons. The first and most obvious is that I’m still pregnant. I know I’m only 40 weeks and a day, and I’m really trying to relax and hope these irregular not that strong contractions progress into something worthwhile over the next few hours. I’m also just annoyed at fielding all the phone calls from people waiting for news. And the comments from strangers are just making me want to punch someone. I know they’re just trying to be friendly but seriously? Saying things like “You are ready to pop huh?” and ” I bet that baby is coming soon – hope your poor swollen feet can hold out” when obviously I am more aware than anyway that a) I AM about to pop and b) my feet are really fucking swollen is just stating the obvious in an obnoxious way right now. Especially when I don’t know you.

So, I will unleash my wrath on random celebrities who also happen to be pregnant (when actually my ire should be directed at the media that perpetuates this magic baby weight loss idea).

Yeah, after coming across this ridiculous headline in Jezebel’s Dirt bag the other morning “Heidi Klum Gains Preggers Pounds, Still Looks Hot” I just had to click through to the article where I learned that she usually gains 40-45 lbs while pregnant.

Well, thanks for sharing Heidi. I’m so happy that you feel the need to advertise this to make the rest of us preggos relate to you. But why don’t you STFU about your weight gain. I know you have a freaking trainer and cook to help you drop those pounds in record time so you can go walk the runway half naked for the Victoria’s Secret show!!

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